Hiatus

Hello there, readers!

I feel like I should re-introduce myself since I haven't been here in so long. What an autumn it's been! I started working full-time in August and the gym time fell to the wayside. Thankfully for me, even though I've been eating junk and not working out, I am on my feet and constantly lifting and moving merchandise, so my metabolism hasn't slowed down at all. I'm still sitting between 240-245lbs, so while it's not great, it's also not as bad as it could be or as bad as it once was.

I'm hoping to get through the holidays unscathed and get back into the gym after the first of the year. I actually miss working out and the high it brings me. I also miss the tanning bed, I can't lie.

In the meantime, I've coined the phrase "Project Pudge," the name I've given to my non-diet I'm on until I get back on course. I'm eating what I love (sometimes too much of it) and just living. I'm not restraining myself or giving up anything. Wise? Most definitely not because now it will be harder once I do get back to the gym, but right now, with the stress levels I'm at, I'm doing what I want to do. (Remind me I said this when the treadmill kicks my ass in January, k?)

I'm still working 40-50 hour weeks and trying to get this book of mine ready for agent queries, so I may not be blogging much (yeah, because the last six months wasn't an indicator? lol), but I will be back and I will be back with avengeance. No worries!

Enjoy your holidays, stay safe and do as I say, not as I do. ;)

Love,

Mel

GAH!

So I went back to the gym today for the first time in almost two months. Yes, I've been a lazy ass for that long. I was actually really disgusted with myself when I came to that realization. Some inspiration I am, huh? *shudder*

Anyway, the gym. Sooooo...that beefed up workout? Kicked. My. Fat. Ass.

I will again preface this blog with DEEP gratitude to @BootCampJoey for helping me come up with it. I'm still in the "construction" stages of this thing - finding my groove, getting back into the habit and figuring out my exact rhythm, but I think it's going to be good once everything falls into place.

I've said before that I don't sweat when I work out. I'm usually plenty hydrated, so it's not that. I just don't sweat. My heart rate hits the 70-80 percentile and I'm huffing and puffing like the Big Bad Wolf, I just don't sweat.

Well, I sweated today. I sweated where I didn't even realize I had sweat glands (Gross. You're welcome.)

I did a five minute stretch before-hand (probably should've done more, now that I am reflecting). I need to talk to @DonniesDancer about some stretches I can do. She's my sensei in everything stretchy.

I got on the treadmill and did a five minute warm-up walk at 3.0 mph at a 10% incline. Usually my warm-ups are 2.5, so I did increase that.

Then.

Came.

Hell.

I cranked up the pace to a steady 7.5 mph. I used the hand grips instead of pumping my arms because with  my short legs I wasn't sure if I could get my strides big enough and keep them up and I feared falling. (Nothing would suck ass worse than falling on the treadmill at that speed.) I did this for 30 seconds. This is where I felt like I was going to die and wondered if the funeral parlor make-up would cover the treadmill burns on my face from where I fell.

Paced back to 3.0 for 30 seconds.

Next sprint I did a 7.0 for 45 seconds. Paced back to 3.5. for about a minute.

Next sprint, I went for  6.5 for 45 seconds, downtimed at 3.0 for a minute.

Next sprint I went for 7.0 again for 45, downtimed at 3.0 for 45.

My last sprint I did 7.0 for 30 seconds and downtimed at 3.0 for 30.

My cool down consisted of 5 minutes at 2.0 and emptying my water bottle.

BUT, I didn't fall. I didn't die and even after my 5 minute of stretching afterward, I'm not sore. WOO! (I did, however, tweet Joey: "I'm gonna kick your ass as soon as I find my legs" in Portuguese.  - Love you, man!)

After having taken two months off and gaining back a few pounds, I'm going to have a couple weeks of misery before I'm back in sync with my body and get this thing figured out. Am I where I want to be? Hell no. But I'll get there. This is a good start. Before I know it, I'll be wondering why I waited so long to do it.

Day 2 of my assassination resumes tomorrow night, provided the lactic acid in my muscles hasn't atrophied by then.

This is gonna suck so good!

I preface this blog with a DEEP thank you to @BootCampJoey for taking the time to answer some questions for me that I've been wondering about for a while. Your willingness to help me is deeply appreciated, my dear!

That being said, Joey's going to kill me.

Okay, so he might not kill me, but the changes he's recommended are going to huuuuuuuurt. I'm leaving Tabata behind (for now) and returning to my old and faithful friend, standard HIIT. Do I love the 4-min workouts my glorious Tabata brings me? Yes. Will I miss them? Yes. But, I trust Joey not to lead me astray.

Beginning next week I'll be increasing my workouts not only in frequency but intensity, as well. I've been doing HIIT 3 days a week and weight training the two days in between, taking two days off a week. I will be bumping up the number of workouts I do weekly to 4-5 days of HIIT and roughly the same of strength training. I will also be intensifying my workouts. Thus far, I've been "pushing" myself with speeds of 4-5mph. Joey's recommendation for me is to double that. I'm not sure how my 24" legs are gonna haul that much ass, but I suppose if he says it can be done, I have to trust that he's right.

Joey, dear, I'm sure I will be cussing you out in three different languages by this time next week, but please know its out of love. :) Thanks for giving a shit!

Thank you, BootCampJoey

I began following @BootCampJoey last week (admittedly for shallow reasons - yes, he's very pretty), but I've come to learn that he's incredibly gifted with his fitness and nutrition knowledge, too. He posted a link tonight to an article that he wrote for SceneOutSD.com. I'm hoping he writes more for them because he's clearly got a lot to say and there's a lot more I want to know about what he wrote.

Joey says, "so as your lean muscle diminishes, your metabolism (your body’s calorie-burning ability) drops. If you do nothing to stem the loss, you could wake up on your 65th birthday and find that you have lost half of your lean body mass and replaced it with twice as much fat!" And while that should be common sense, unfortunately, not a lot of people think that far in advance. So many of us want immediate results (Guilty, part of one right here) and we don't realize that if we want true, lasting results, we can't be so short-sighted.

Summed up, Joey discusses the benefits of HIIT (high-intensity interval training) opposed to standard cardio work in regards to actual fat burning. In a different article I read last night, it was further explained to me that during HIIT, you increase your anaerobic threshold, which (without going into lengthy, scientific explanation) means more muscle is built and more fat is burned.

The thing that constantly amazes me is that given how popular HIIT is becoming that there are still thousands of people who stick with the same boring routine: 10 minute warm up, 3-5 miles at a steady pace on the treadmill and a 10-minute cool down. That's anywhere from thirty minutes to an hour spent exercising and you're getting a fraction of the results you can get by doing a work-out that can take as little as four minutes (by doing Tabata, which is what I do now) or 15-20-minutes (by doing standard HIIT, what I did before I discovered Tabata). I just don't understand why someone would choose to work harder and longer when the results are so much better working shorter and smarter.

Anyway...something to chew on for thought tonight. As always - research, read, investigate, question and clarify everything you read. I don't have all the answers, but I pay mighty-close attention to those who do.

Thank you, Joey for allowing me to feature your article on my blog. xo

It's working! It's working!

So for the last few months, I've been lamenting the fact that the scale has virtually stood still, so a few weeks ago I went to my doctor who did a basal metabolic scan. This scan is done electronically and is as simple as a couple of sticky pads hooked up to some wires. It takes less than 30 seconds. Easy peasy.

Today was the first doctor visit I've had since the scan last month. I was thrilled with the results and so was he. My last scan was done in January 2008.

Since the last scan, I have:

• Lost 11lbs of body fat
• Gained 2lbs of lean muscle tissue
• Gained ~ 3liters of total body water
• Gained 6lbs of support structure

My BMI has gone from 44.6 to 43.43 and my basal metabolic rate has increased from 1549 to 1609.

I know that these numbers may not make much sense to you. If you'd like an explanation, read further. If not, suffice it to say that all of these numbers have moved in the right direction and all of my work has paid off this last year. I'm SO happy with these numbers!!!


***
Further explanation:

Body Fat: This is pure body fat that I have shed since the last scan. On the Jan 08 scan, I had 145.2 lbs of body fat. This scan, I have 134.3lbs.

Lean Muscle Tissue: This is pure muscle that I have gained since my last scan. On the Jan 08 scan, I had 54.6 lbs of lean muscle mass. This scan, I have 56.6

Total Body Water: This is how much water is in my body. The higher the number, the better hydrated I am. Contrary to what it may seem, this is NOT indicative of bad water retention.  Last scan, I had 42.5L. This scan I had 45.3L

Support Structure: This consists of the parts of the body used for structure - bones, ligaments, tendons, etc. My last scan, I had 56.0lbs of support structure. This scan, I have 62.1lbs.

BMI: Body Mass Index - a statistical measure of weight/height to determine a healthy level of fat. While I am still considered "obese" the numbers are going down. Last scan: 44.6. This scan, 43.3.

Basal Metabolic Rate: the number of calories your body burns while resting in order to maintain normal body functions. Meaning, if all I do is breathe that day, I can take in ___ calories and maintain my weight. Last scan, my BMR was 1549. This scan is 1609.

Again, while in and of themselves, the numbers from this scan are not great, when compared to the last scan, there's significant progress being made. I have to keep these numbers in mind when I get discouraged that the scale isn't going up or down or that my pants are getting looser fast enough.

I'm very encouraged by this progress. :)

Basketcase, party of one, your table is ready

So this week has pretty much been hell: PCLD (Post-Concert Let Down for those out there unfamiliar with the term), Celtics loss, financial stress and knowing that I'm not in New York City this weekend for the be-all-end-all of concerts as my boys play Radio City Music Hall for the first time.

As we've established, I'm an emo-eater. Stress? Eat. Sickness? Eat. Depressed? Eat. Happy? Eat. Angry? Eat.

Do you see a pattern here?

Combine my emo-eating with travel & laziness and you've got the recipe for a weight gain. This could truly end badly and that scares me.

*sigh*

So back on the wagon I go. I've been neglecting this blog (and subsequently you, my readers) far too long. Hold me accountable, dammit!!!

On a side note, when I stopped weighing myself (because the fucking scale hadn't moved more than 5 spots up or down in over three months), I got on the other day and dropped 11lbs or some such shit. I'm at 239. Go me!!

Foodie revisited

I said it before. I'll say it again. I. Love. Food.

Mostly, I love all the stuff that's bad for me, but I enjoy salads and fruits & vegetables, too. 

That being said, I was a BAD girl on vacation. Having never visited California before, I wanted to take in as many of the new foods as I could. I knew I'd work it all off either climbing the hills in SF or working out (if I didn't feel I got the exercise I needed during the day).

When I got into San Francisco Friday night, the first thing we did was go to In n' Out (Damn you, Harry Snyder!). Upon the recommendation from one of my followers (ahem, totally calling you out, @MichaelTimmons!), I ordered the #1 with animal-style fries and a chocolate shake. This thing was AMAZING. The burgers are all made fresh, as are the fries. The shake was to die for and I appreciated every artery-clogging bite of my meal. YUM. MY!

That night, Tracy, DawnL and I sat around and had some wine. This wine was the sweetest, most flavorful wine I've ever tasted. (Shameless plug for Fantasia from Castello di Amorosa in Napa.) Again - definitely not on the diet. But oh so good!

On Friday, Tara, Tracy and I headed to the Wharf. We bypassed the Ben & Jerry's shop and the pretzel & cotton candy stand (much to my dismay), but had a delicious dinner at the Pier Market. While I should've probably avoided the creamy chowder, I didn't. I did however avoid the fish and chips (save for a couple small bites Tracy shared with me - that stuff was amazing!). I had the New England clam chowder and a salad instead (and a delicious cocktail). I won't think about the number of empty calories in any of it.

Fortunately, this dietary wrist-slit was counteracted by the miles we walked around at the Wharf and up and down Lombard Street that day. I don't feel too guilty about it. I also didn't buy anything at Ghiradelli Square, so there's that. (Does the single square of chocolate they gave us as a sample count? I don't think so.) 

We joined DawnL later that night for dinner at The Silk Road. I skipped the liquor and had water instead (go me!). They brought us a killer appetizer of flat bread and some Mediterranean salsa thing (balsamic vinegar & olive oil based. Need I say more?).

For dinner, I debated between the ravioli and the lamb shank. Committed to trying new things, I opted for the lamb. I wasn't disappointed. It was DELICIOUS! It was served in a unique tomato sauce, garlic mashed potatoes and steamed veggies. 

Saturday brought me a few handfuls of movie popcorn (shameless plug for MacGruber. Go see it!) and some Sour Patch Kids. It also brought me a corndog late in the afternoon from Dairy Queen (hey, I bypassed the Blizzard. Gimme some credit.) and another late night visit to In n' Out. I skipped the cheese on my double burger and ate my fries with just the special sauce instead of animal-style. Obviously I should've skipped the whole damn place, but I did all right with what I could. We rounded out the night at home with some more wine (Yes, I drank the entire bottle of Moscato while I was there, so sue me).

Sunday, I had lunch with an old classmate and we went to Pasta Pomodoro. I ordered the Conchiglie Gamberi and like everything else this weekend, it wasn't healthy. It was pasta shells with asparagus, tomatoes and shrimp with a cream & shrimp stock sauce. De. Lish.

Sunday night we finished out our weekend with a decandent dinner at Bruno's on Fillmore. The girls opted for cheesy garlic bread, but I chose the calamari at our waiter's suggestion. It was good, but nothing special. The lasagna and salad, though. HOLY COW! Good stuff!!!

What's the point of this (very tempting) blog? The point is, you can be human. You can have a weekend of selfish indulgence. You can "cheat" from time to time. Just don't make a habit of it. I put on 3-4lbs this weekend, but I'll work it back off. I have realistic expectations of myself and I'm willing to deal with the consequences of my actions. A weekend like this will mean more time on the treadmill, but it was worth it. I got to try new things and not worry about the shouldn't do's.

The numbers don't lie

It's easy sometimes when you're as big as I am to look at yourself in the mirror and not see a big difference in progress. Over the last year I've seen my sizes go down, but until just now, I hadn't realized just how much weight/inches I've lost total.

To put it in perspective:

Since last May, I've maintained a 20lb weight loss. I was up to 37lbs down at one point, but slacked off and gained 17lbs back. (NOT happy about this, btw.) I've lost 3" off my bust, 2" off my chest, 6" off my waist and 4" off my hips. My legs are as solid as solid gets, so I've only lost an inch off my thighs and a half inch off my calves. My biceps are becoming more defined, though. I've lost 2" off of those (goodbye fat, hello muscle!). My neck has fluctuated an inch one way or another all year long.

I could very easily complain about those 17lbs gained or the fact that I've plateaued, but instead, I choose to celebrate how far I've come. I still have a long way to go, but I'm confident I will get there. I didn't get to this size overnight and I won't lose it overnight, either. I'm okay with that...even for as frustrated as I get.

People (myself included) put a lot of emphasis on actual pounds lost or gained, but we have to remember that it's not all about pounds. It's inches, too. How do your clothes fit? Do your ankles feel puffy? Can you see your collarbone? One of my first goals last year wasn't to get into a smaller sized dress. It was to be able to buckle the strap on a pair of sexy-ass shoes I'd gotten the year before for my birthday. Sure enough, my first goal met was getting into those shoes. It's not about the weight, girls. It's about overall health & fitness.

I'm kicking ass, I feel good and that's what counts!

Sooooo....Tabata?

So as it stands, I haven't lost a pound since my last weigh-in, a week ago Saturday. Obviously I'm disappointed by this, but I'm gonna stick with this tabata thing for a while. I've got some travel coming up, which will interfere with my workout schedule and diet, so I'm trying to keep an open mind and make sure that I'm giving this new workout the right amount of time to start working. If, after a month, I don't see a difference in weight and/or inches, then I'll reevaluate then.

Until then, as it stands, I'm still hovering at 245.

sigh

What a Marshmallow!

My favorite line in "New Moon" is when Jacob calls Mike a "marshmallow." It just makes me giggle.

But he's right. Mike was a marshmallow.

My point?

So am I.

I've been sitting here pity partying about not losing any weight, not dropping any sizes, not losing any inches. Wah, wah, wah. *insert one of my typical eyerolls here*

Here's the thing. I'm pussing out on my workouts. That's the only thing I can come up with. I've been a complete marshmallow and I haven't pushed myself as hard as I can on my workouts. I've been focused on doing X number of reps in an X amount of time. When I get a little winded, I slow down or I cut my reps. When I get sick of drinking water, I switch to herbal tea. When I want a Coke, I have one.

What the hell?

Yeah, cuz that will work well for losing weight.

Starting tomorrow, I'm going to push myself harder, push myself longer, dig deeper for what I know is there. I've lost focus and I can't do that anymore.

I bought a new pair of capris the other day. I went up a size. Screw that noise. I'm not going to get fatter. Period. Ain't happening.

What about you? Are you a marshmallow? Are you pushing yourself hard enough?

Day three on the "new" workout

I did Tabata on Saturday and again Sunday. I wouldn't recommend this because your body needs a day of rest between cardio workouts. I did it because I'd gotten off schedule (I am scheduled to do cardio 3x a week and weights twice a week) and tried to get caught back up. I also wanted to teach @projectdance how to do Tabata because she was interested in spicing up her workout. (She agrees that its the easiest/hardest workout she's ever done. Easiest because it only takes 4 minutes. Hardest because it kicks. your. ass.)

Sunday, I overdid some yardwork and ended up pulling a shoulder muscle and I've been feeling pretty miserable, trying to baby it a little bit until it heals. So today, I took it easy on the shoulder weights, but I did some circuit training as well as 100's and some crunches on the inclined bench. I rounded out my workout with a tan, which is my little mini-reward after every workout.

So far, I'm feeling good about this change in my workout. The Tabata was easier the second day and I suspect it will continue to get better, which is great, but my biggest hope is that it kickstarts my metabolism into gear again. We'll see how it goes!

Ahh, Tabata

Tabata (tah-BAH-tuh) is another type of high intensity interval training. If you've read my other blogs, you know what my typical workouts consist of. Baffled at my metabolic issues, I've been trying to think of things I can do to kick it into gear. When I did some research on HIIT training, Tabata came up. I hadn't heard of it before, so I clicked on a couple links and it intrigued me. I watched a video of someone doing it and was impressed.

The basic gist of Tabata is four minutes of intervals. 20 seconds hard core, 10 seconds rest, repeating 8 times. (It didn't mention it on the sites I read, but I strongly recommend 5 min warm-ups and cool-downs, too). It's very similiar to the HIIT I've been doing, but on a much small, much more intense scale. In this video you can see first-hand that it's not an easy workout. I figured it was worth a shot and might shake up my metabolism a little bit. If today's workout was any indication, I'm right.

I did my 5 min warm up on the treadmill, then switched to the elliptical. I set the resistance at about 15 and pounded it as hard as my legs would go for 20 seconds. I slowed to a walking pace for 10 seconds. By 3 minutes in, I couldn't breathe and my legs burned so bad I wanted to die. But with ONE minute left, I knew I could push through the pain and keep going. With a 15 minute HIIT workout, after 3 minutes, you've still got a lot of reps left and even those twelve minutes can seem like forever, even if it is done at 30 second intervals.

I finished the entire four minutes and stepped off the machine to get the sanitizer and I thought I was gonna collapse. My legs were (and still, two hours later) Jell-O. My heart rate topped out at 177 (not smart, btw. I shouldn't have let it get that high) and it took me 30 minutes to get back to my normal resting heart rate of 75-80.

I feel like I actually did something today rather than just pranced along on the treadmill. I'm hoping this is what my body needs. I'll keep you posted.

Today's weigh-in - 245
We'll see where I'm at this time next week. :)

Basal Metabolic Rate & all that junk

Yesterday, I went to my doctor for my re-exam. (This is a test done every twelve weeks or so to see how my body is holding adjustments and maintaining overall health.) We discussed the whole veggie cleanse thing. He was disappointed that it didn't work as he'd hoped (to kickstart/shock my metabolism into gear). I asked him if it even had enough time to work since I only did a day and a half of it. He said, "Yes, it should've shocked it. But it didn't. And we need to figure out why."

So he did some searching in my chart to see if we'd done a basal metabolic test. This is a test that determines what calorie intake I would need to have to maintain weight by doing nothing more than laying in bed. We did do a BMT in early spring 2008. My rate was 1550-1570. This means, if I'm not doing anything else, I should maintain my weight by taking in 1550-1570 calories a day. I'm *not* taking in that few amount, although I should be. I'm usually roughly between 1700-2000 calories a day. Even so, with the amount of physical activity I'm doing, I should *still* be losing weight, even if slowly and I'm not - I lose 5lbs, I gain 5lbs. This particular BMT was done in 2008, so we're doing another test on the 25th to get a more accurate reading. We'll also do a Ragland's test, to see if my adrenal system is functioning correctly. (You can Google these to find out what they are.)

I asked him how we can get my metabolic rate to go up because I just can't (i.e. "won't") survive on 1500 calories or less. He said to just continue doing what I'm doing by working out. The higher the lean tissue mass I have, the higher that metabolic rate will be. Seems easy enough and makes sense, but he and I are still concerned as to why my metabolism seemed to work fine last summer and now is back to working like this. (Hence the reason we're testing on the 25th.)

Until then, I'm not freaking out. I'm not changing anything. Gonna keep busting ass at the gym and eating healthy. Still drinking hoards of water. Not much else I can do until we know what I'm dealing with. If it turns out that there is a problem with my thyroid or adrenal system, there are supplements I can take and things I can do dietary- and exercise-wise that will help correct it.

Just wanted to give an update for those who were wondering what all the talk was about my basal metabolic rate.

Keep Keepin' On!

Ok, so I started doing 100's today. Those suckers are TOUGH! Up to this point, I'd been doing sit-ups, which were going well, but I didn't feel the burn in my upper abs like I wanted. I was afraid I wasn't working them. I'll sure do it with the 100's!

I was going to start kicking up my reps on HIIT from 6 to 8 this week, but it didn't happen. We'll start that tomorrow. I'm doing better now on the 6's, so that'll help. Might even do more about upping my metab, so yay!

I've been doing well on what I'm eating. I think I've said before, I don't really deny myself cravings. I just limit them. Instead of buying a king-sized candy bar when I'm craving chocolate, I get a small one or a bag of miniatures. I know how much harder it is on the treadmill when I work out, so I don't eat the whole bag like I used to. Same with soda. I have cut soda out of my diet...relatively speaking. But every once in a while, I get a really bad Coke craving, so I indulge. I don't buy a case of soda & drink it in three days like I used to, but I'll buy a 20 oz bottle once in a great while. The last soda I had was a week ago. Before that, it was almost a month. That's BIG for me.

I see a lot of people trying to lose weight right now. Many of my followers are doing it for the NKOTB cruise and/or the summer (non)tour. Some are doing it for health, some are doing it for vanity, some are doing it for swimsuit season, some are doing it to lower stress. Whatever the reason, GOOD FOR YOU!!! It's tough to make changes to your life like this. Any changes you're making are great!

So to those making these changes, KEEP KEEPIN' ON!!!

Today was a good day!

I've been a member of Sparkpeople.com for several years now and haven't lived up to the goals I've set for myself on there. The site is fantastic, but it also holds you accountable. Some days I just don't wanna hear I screwed up. I don't want to see that I went 500 calories over my allotted intake, so if I don't plug in my food for the day, then I don't know that I went over. And if I didn't see that I went over, then it's like I didn't go over. Yeeeeeaaaaaah. There's logic & common sense for ya, right?

Anyway...I have been trying to get to the bottom of my shitty metabolism or at least see if its shitty metabolism or just my own denial rearing its ugly head again. The last few blogs have touched on that, I think.

Since I'm trying to figure out what's going wrong and where, I've been trying to do better about logging what I eat, what I do for my workout, etc so I can track exactly what's going on.

Today?

Today was the first day in THREE years that I didn't go over on ANY of my nutrition goals for the day. Some days I'll be fine on calories, fat & carbs, but be waaaaaay under on protein. Other days I might be okay on everything but fat or carbs. It's tough to get a good mix of where I should be. Today, though...I made it.

I'm pretty proud of myself!!

General Training and My Typical Workout

From everything I've read and researched about High Intensity Interval Training, it is based on a "work smarter, not harder" mentality. The body doesn't need to work out for hours on end. You don't need to work every muscle, every day. In fact, it's recommended to alternate cardio & weight-training every other day so your body has time to heal itself between workouts. Make sure to stretch, warm-up and cool-down before and after every workout, regardless of what you're doing. This can prevent injury, increase blood-flow and help flush toxins from your body that can harbor sickness and disease.

Weight training will help you build muscle. The stronger the muscles, the more quickly and easily you will burn excess fat. Cardio training will help strengthen your heart & lungs and increase blood flow throughout your body. (The links will show you the numerous benefits of each type of training and their effects on your body & overall health. You can Google them both for more links to various articles online.)

All gyms should offer you a session where a trainer will show you how to work the machines. Many gyms will also offer a personalized training session where you learn how to monitor your resting heart rate and figure out what machines are best for you based on your fitness goals. They can also help you determine what your maximum heart rate should be so you don't overdo it. Some gyms charge for this consultation. Others don't. The YMCA is where I learned what works best for my body and the service was included in my membership. If you don't know for sure what your gym offers, ASK! And even if it is a small fee to have a trainer help you get started, it's well worth the money spent. You can avoid injury and wasted time & money by knowing what you should be doing to meet your goals. 

While the links are posted to the left, I thought I'd break down my workout for you. This is NOT meant to set any example of what you should do. That should be determined by you and your trainer. This is simply an explanation of what my trainer and I figured out for me.

Sun/Tue/Thurs

• Stretch - 10 minutes - warm up the muscles.
• HIIT on the treadmill (including warm-up & cool-down)  - described below
• Stretch - 10 minutes - cool down the muscles 

Mon/Wed

• Stretch - 10 minutes - warm up the muscles
• Circuit Weight Training - Upper & lower body muscle groups: This includes several machines that work upper back, shoulder, chest, arms, abs, thigh, calf, butt and lower back muscles. 
• Stretch - 10 minutes - cool down the muscles

I do crunches/sit-ups every day, whether I'm at the gym or not, seven days a week. At home, I tuck my feet under the edge of  the couch and do between 40 and 50 full sit-ups, taking a minute or so between reps of 10. At the gym, I use a bench with a 30-45° incline and I do crunches. Because of the incline, I do fewer of them for now - usually cranking out about 20-30 - again, doing reps and taking breaks. I do ab-work daily because the majority of my excess weight is in my belly and the leaner the muscles in those areas, the more quickly and easily I will burn fat in that area. 

As far as my HIIT goes (an example of the first week doing this training):

0:00-5:00     3.0 mph - a slow, but steady walking pace

5:00-5:30     5.0 mph - a slow, but steady jogging pace

5:30-6:00     3.0 mph

6:00-6:30     5.2 mph

6:30-7:00     3.0 mph

7:00-7:30     5.4 mph

7:30-8:00     3.0 mph

8:00-8:30     5.4 mph

8:30-9:00     3.0 mph

9:00-9:30     5.2 mph

9:30-10:00   3.0 mph

10:00-10:30 5.0 mph

10:30-15:30 2.4 mph

The highlighted time frames are my "sprints." (Granted, this isn't a sprint for most people, but when you're carrying around 80 extra pounds on legs with a 26" inseam, it sure as hell feels like one. With time, that pace will increase.) When I first started this workout, I had 30 second sprints with a minute and a half in between to ease off and catch my breath. Then, as time went on, I decreased the time to a minute between them, now, thirty seconds between them. Starting tomorrow, I will increase the number of sprints I do from the 6 I do now up to 8 sprints, then 10 the following week or two, then 12 after that. Once I'm consistently doing twelve 30-second sprints without as much difficulty, I'll increase my pace and spread out my stride so my legs are opening more and I'm covering more distance (which will make my pace not seem as difficult. It will work those legs muscles, however and increase the cardio workout I'm getting). 

Over time, this workout (like all workouts) will put you at a plateau. For those unfamiliar with that, it's where what you're doing just doesn't seem to be working much anymore. You can do several things to change that:

1. Increase your pace
2. Increase your incline
3. Spread your stride farther so your legs are opening more
4. Wear ankle or wrist weights
5. Change machines (you can do HIIT on a stationary bike and an elliptical, too)

It is vitally important to make sure you're well-hydrated before and after a workout. If you feel thirsty after you work out or you find that you're not sweating much, you're dehydrated. You need water. Not coffee. Not milk. Not soda (not even diet). Not Gatorade or Vitamin Water. PLAIN WATER. Bottled, filtered, tap, from the fountain...whatever it takes to get the water in your system, do it. Not only will it keep your body functioning correctly, it will help flush toxins out of your body that build up during a work out. Between proper stretching & hydration, you shouldn't be sore after a workout, even if you're new to doing it.

 Hope this blog helps explain a little better what I do when I'm in the gym and how you can maximize your workout. :)

**DISCLAIMERS**

If at ANY point in your workout, you feel pain, STOP immediately. Don't push yourself thinking it's just a spasm or a pulled muscle. You could severely injure yourself. For instance, this week, instead of taking today off, I took Wednesday off. My knee was out of joint and I was in some pain. The day off helped my body heal itself. The only reason I didn't go to my doctor to have him take a look at it is because I know my body and I knew what I'd done to get myself in that situation. I don't recommend this for you. If you hurt, it's for a reason and you need to find out what that reason is. It's always a good idea to have your doctor check things out for you before you start working out for the first time or before you continue your workout after an injury.

As always, I am not a health or fitness professional. If your trainer is telling you something different from what you read here, follow their instructions. They know you personally. I don't. I'm simply relaying what works best for my body.

Your average random Saturday

I'm thrilled to see the new followers I have for this blog! I never expected anyone outside my close circle of friends to take an interest in what I was doing, so I'm pleasantly surprised at the turn this has taken. I know I owe some of that appreciation to Sherri (you rock, girl!). Welcome aboard!

Today, I returned to the gym. I usually take Friday's off simply because of my husband's work schedule and our distance from the gym. We've got one car and he works about an 18 hour day on Fridays, so it's tough for me to get anywhere.

I talked to my friend RiceChex last night who discussed the whole veggie cleanse fiasco with me. She asked me what else I could do to kick my metabolism into gear since the cleanse didn't turn out as planned. She reminded me that last year I had more dedication to my workouts than I've had this year. I hadn't really seen it, but after she brought it up, I knew she was right (don't tell her that. I'll never hear the end of it.). So I committed to doing the gym five days a week. Typically I go around 10pm because the family is in bed and @ProjectDance and I can go together and work out. The days I typically take off are Fridays and Saturdays. I think a steady commitment to the gym will help. The newly acquired info about my water intake should help, too.

I'm not doing any low-fat, high-fiber special things with my diet, though I do plan on trying to ease up on the carbs a bit and lowering my fat intake. I'm also going to try to monitor my food through SparkPeople.com like I was before. I always do better if I can see exactly what's going into my body and what I'm expending energy-wise.

I head to Chicago in 40 days to see NKOTB. I'd hoped to have been at my goal weight (165) before that time came, but considering I've still got about 80lbs to go and I've been stagnant for this long, I don't see that happening. But, I can get to a smaller goal by then and I'm committing to that now. By June 4th. I want to be under 220lbs. Based on the changes I'm making and the experience I've had in the past, I believe this is completely attainable with hard work.

I need your help, though. I need accountability from you all. Encouragement & accountability, both.

Can you help me?

Veggie Cleanse - day 2 - a.k.a: Fail Day

I. Wanna. Die.

No, seriously.

I chose carrots today. Healthy veggie, right? I love carrots, so it shouldn't be an issue. I dragged out a bag of baby carrots and munched on probably a pound of them total. Weird thing was, I still had hunger pangs. Common sense told me to eat more or drink water, which I did. This didn't help, so I called my doctor. He said I could have some lean protein to help with the hunger. I had about 6oz of canned tuna. It distracted the hunger pangs.

In their place, however are pretty bad stomach cramps. So I called my doctor again. He said that the carrots have probably absorbed the excess water in my system and are sitting there in my intestines like a big lump.

Fantastic.

He suggested switching to peas or celery and upping my water intake. Said not to do any more protein. Just stick with the new veggie and more water. I tried the celery and drank two bottles of water almost instantly. I still have cramps. This thing SUCKS.

I know y'all hate the F word, but fuck this.

I can't do this. I like veggies, don't get me wrong, but I can't take this.

The stomach cramps and cravings aside, I'm ready to murder people. I got behind someone doing 59 in a 65 speed zone last night and was ready to run them off the road. Homicidal doesn't even begin to cover the mood swings I'm going through.

Enough's enough. I'm not this strong. And I'm certain there aren't enough alibis or English-speaking nonextradition countries out there to hide my ass when I go postal.

Metabolism? You're on your own, buddy. This bitch needs food.

I miss sugar.

I don't get a sweet tooth, per se. I like chocolate and candy as much as the next girl, but it's not the cravings I get (my cravings are salty, crunchy snacks). But when I committed to losing weight and becoming healthier, I knew sugar was something I was going to have to say goodbye to, or at least not visit it as frequently as I had been.

That left me with very few options. There are, of course, the artificial sweeteners, but if you've read any of my blogs, you know how I feel about those. They're dangerous and I don't trust them not to kill me - or at the very least, make my jiggly bits shrivel up and fall off.

I'm a pop drinker. Have been since the womb. I miss it. I'm also a sweet tea drinker, but without sugar to sweeten it, I knew those days were over, too. Not to mention, the caffeine in both beverages act as a diuretic and would affect how much MORE water I'd need to drink. When I'm already supposed to be taking in between 120-140oz a day, every ounce counts. I wasn't willing to risk it.

When I went to the doctor a couple weeks ago and discussed my water intake, I talked to him about how BORING all this damn water was. He suggested trying these little packets of fruit flavored sweetener called Stevita, kind of like Crystal Light (without the death. WOO!). So I took a cherry flavored packet with me. I dumped it in a bottle of water and holy buckets, I'm hooked! It's advertised as being as sweet as sugar, but I think it's actually sweeter.

Since I love my tea, I looked for alternative options. I discovered that Tazo Passion Tea (one of my favorite drinks from Starbucks) is herbal and totally caffeine free. Combine that with Stevia and I knew I could have it. Granted, pure water is the best way to get my water intake, but I knew I'd grow discouraged quickly if I didn't come up with other options. So, between the Tazo w/Stevia and the water with Stevita, I may actually get through this thing!!

I haven't tried Stevia yet in baking or cooking, but I'm anxious to try that, too. If anybody has any tried & true recipes, please let me know!

Dear Sherri,

Dear Sherri,

Thanks, Girl.

You're killin' me!

You realize of course, people are going to read this blog and expect some hugely inspirational messages or helpful diet tips. They're going to imagine in their heads that I'm some fatty-turned-Barbie with all the answers.

When they don't get those things, I'm sending them back to you, k??

Love,
Melly (*who's just a slowly converting fatty on day two of a vegetable cleanse and, as a result, is snarkier than her usual self and is sitting in complete awe and disbelief that Sherri-Friggin'-Shepherd just called her out on Twitter)

Veggie cleanse - day 1

This. Sucks.

I've eaten three bags of lima beans today. I put them in a saucepan with a little diced onion (it's the ONE "cheat" I did) and some water. Salt, pepper, Lawry's & garlic powder for some flavor. It's not ham and cornbread, but it'll do.

It's almost 11pm. I've made it thirteen hours. At this point, I'm not thinking of the four days I still have left. I'm going minute by minute. Hour by hour.

I *might* make it til midnight.

I did work out. Kicked ass. 20 min HIIT & 10 mins stretching.

All I want is a fucking cheeseburger.

Vegetable cleanse?

Last summer, I dropped weight like a virgin loses her cherry on prom night. It absolutely melted off of me. I didn't give up all junk foods, but I did make considerable sacrifices and on the days I "cheated" I worked out extra hard or I compensated the next day with what I ate. It paid off.

I'm doing the same thing I did last summer when the weight dropped and so far I'm not making any progress. I go down two pounds, I go up two pounds. I've only lost 5 of the 15lbs I put back on over the winter and the lack of progress is thoroughly pissing me off.

I brought this up to my doctor tonight and he suggested more water (freakin' A! Okay, okay, so I'm not drinking the 10 bottles a day I should be drinking. *wry grin*) and a cleanse of some type. He said it didn't really matter which type of cleanse I did as long as it was enough to shock my body into saying "Umm...what's going on here? Let's kick this metabolism into gear!" And that's the goal here. I'm not out to clean out the colon or flush my kidneys. Just looking to shake up my metabolism.

When I looked at my cupboards when I got home, I realized that I've got some spoilable foods that need to be eaten before we start this cleanse, so I'll be starting it Wednesday or Thursday instead of tomorrow.

For five days, I eat nothing but vegetables. I take a multi-vitamin and drink all the water I want, but nothing food-wise except a vegetable. Wednesday, for instance, I will eat nothing but carrots. I can cook them, steam them, eat them raw. I can season them with any spice, but no butter, sugar, dips or sauces. Thursday, I'll do lima beans (or a different vegetable). So on and so forth. When the five days is up, I munch throughout the day on light foods, introducing them back into my diet slowly.

Again, this isn't for weight loss, it's to boost my metabolism a bit since it seems to be stagnant right now.

I apologize now for those I may piss off with my attitude over the next five days. ;)

How do you stay motivated?

Such a loaded question.

When I'm motivated, it's based on many things: how I look in the mirror, how I feel, how tight those new jeans are, how bloated my feet are, how tired I feel, how energetic I feel. There are a dozen factors and some come and go.

When I'm not feeling motivated, it helps to get feedback from Danny or Donnie. Jordan and all his talk of stretching does nothing for me, honestly. But let Danny tell me about drinking enough water or Donnie tell me to stop making excuses and do what needs to be done and I'm ALLLLL over it! I can't explain it.

I fight remnants of depression (which I've written about in earlier blogs) and getting out of the house sometimes feels overwhelming, but once I'm working out, I've had very few days when I just couldn't finish my workout. Those days usually fall on the first day after a couple days off, so naturally, it's tougher to do my regular workout on those days. My muscles are a little stiffer, my lungs a little weaker. A day or two in the gym and that goes away.

For me, my workout is guaranteed MEL time. My kids don't go with me and the hubby hasn't used his gym card since we signed up six months ago. Even when @ProjectDance goes with me, we both have our iPods on and we're just in the same room together. It's her time, too. With both of us having kids & husbands & busy lives outside of ourselves, that's sometimes the ONLY time we have that's fully ours. When you look at it as a reward, it feels like less work. Don't get me wrong...it is work, but it doesn't always feel like it.

You're the only one who can determine what motivates you. You are the maestro of your workout - find out what works for you and then work it. :)

A couple disclaimers of sorts

1. I'm NOT a medical professional.
2. I'm NOT formally educated in the medical, dietary or fitness-related fields.
3. My experiences are just that: experiences. I don't claim to be an expert on any of the things I blog about. They're simply guides as to what has worked or not worked for me.
4. If your doctor, dietician or trainer is telling you something different from what I've stated in my blogs, then GO WITH THAT. Again, I don't have the years of medical training he has.

That being said, I know what I know about myself because I take the time to research EVERYTHING I'm told - whether it be something I read online or something my doctor tells me. Yes, I question my doctor. Every time I turn around, actually. Some things he tells me makes sense. Other things, not so much. Either way, I research it so that when I'm asked "Why do you do that?" I can be ready with concrete answers and evidence of what I'm talking about.

I challenge my doctor at every turn.

Doc: "Your lymph nodes are blocked and that's why your sinuses aren't draining."
Me: "Why?"
Doc: "Well....(insert explanations here)."
Me: "What can I do to change that?" or "Why does it do that?

Honestly, I'm sure some days my doctor wants to just strangle me for all the questions I ask. I ask these questions because four years ago, I took control of my health care.

After I dealt with several bouts of unexplained facial paralysis (to this day, nobody knows what happened or why), I was told by my medical doctor (not the one I currently see) that my facial paralysis was caused by...

(wait for it...)

Depression.

Yes. Read it again: depression.

Now, I know that depression can cause a lot of physical ailments: fatigue, headaches, lethargia, insomnia, etc. But facial paralysis? Really?

I said, "But I don't feel depressed."

She said, "That's the depression talking. Here's a prescription for Lexapro." She told me the facial paralysis was probably permanent, but physical therapy would help me learn to speak more clearly over time.

This was my first dose of just how warped the medical profession had become.

(Surely I don't have to explain why I came to this conclusion, right?)

I, being the opinionated person I am, told her to take her prescription and shove it up her poorly-educated and pharmaceutically-kissed ass and left. I haven't been back.

Nor will I.

Every single symptom I have now, I take to my kinesiologist/chiropractor. When he saw my facial paralysis, he adjusted two spots in my neck. Within 20 minutes, I had feeling back, my muscles worked again and my speech and facial expressions were restored to full use. Had I blindly taken the advice of my MD, I may still have lasting effects of Bell's Palsy. Thankfully, I didn't. I researched. I learned. I chose other options.

When I try new things with my diet or exercise regimen, it's at my doctor's suggestion or because of something I've heard working for someone else. I research stuff to death and my bookmarks are filled to the brim with pages I can go to to back up why it works the way it does.

Again, I don't expect everyone to be on board with me. It'd be nice, but I'm not naive enough to think that's gonna happen. All I ask you to do is listen to what I have to say. Try it for yourself. If you choose not to, that's your problem. I know what works for me and I'm fairly certain, based on my research and experience, that it can work for you, too, but I can't make you do it.

So, that's where I'm at. Just felt the need to explain why I know what I know and why I am so firm in my beliefs that we're capable of creating healthy bodies without the use of pills, operations or ridiculous diet/exercise plans.

(Here's a picture of what I looked like when I went to my MD:)

This water thing

Some disclaimers:
Ok...first off - I'm not going to die from drinking too much water. I want to relieve your worries right now:
Water Intoxication information
More Water Intoxication info
Even more info on Water Intoxication
I am neither a six month old infant nor an athlete. Nor am I drinking obscene amounts of water in short periods of time. On average, in fact, I'm drinking one 16.9 ounce bottle an hour. And if you've been paying attention to my Twitter, I'm also urinating frequently, which is something the woman who died did not do.

Secondly, I am under my doctor's supervision. He's been my doctor for the last four years and been in the medical profession for almost 15 yrs. While he does approach health holistically, he is licensed and is more than qualified to determine what's right for my health.

Thirdly, I'm neither endorsing this as a diet plan nor am I saying it will work the same way for those who want to try it as it's working for me.


Disclaimers aside, I went to my doctor earlier this week and explained the fact that while I've been working out - maybe not quite as diligently as I should be - for the last two months consistently, I haven't dropped any weight. In fact, I've put weight on.

And before you can say, "Well, muscle weighs more than fat.." blah blah blah...

While I know this is technically true, that's not the case here. I can feel that I'm not losing fat. It's all sitting around my waist and ass. My clothes are tight. I feel bloated and I'm quite lethargic. In fact, the workout I was doing just a month ago has become difficult for me to do. This was of the biggest concern to me when I brought it to my doctor's attention.

He asked me some questions and did some diagnostic testing and determined that my body is not digesting properly due to low stomach acid. It was also determined that I'm not drinking nearly enough water for my weight/activity levels. (This would also help to explain why I don't sweat when I work out, despite my higher heart rate during my cardio-intensive workout.)

Based on these diagnoses, I have been given a supplement to help my body create more stomach acid, which will aid in my digestion and because food is being metabolized correctly, could aid in weight loss. The additional water that I'm taking in will help flush my body of the toxins it's been holding onto, increase my metabolism and aid in my overall cardiovascular & kidney health.

I've had a lot of people say "OMG, I'd die if I drank that much water." I thought that, too. Believe me, I don't ENJOY drinking water. I'd much rather have a soda or a glass of sweet tea, but those are horrible for me. Soda's high in sugar and sodium (and the diet sodas are even worse. Don't get me started.) and sweet tea, obviously has added sugar. But truth of the matter is, good hydration is key to good health, clean complexion, proper body function and staying healthy. When we're properly hydrated, our bodies will let go of retained water because it realizes that it's getting enough and it doesn't have to hang onto what it does get.


"How much water are you drinking?"
For my weight and activity levels, I'm trying to drink between 160-180 ounces a day. My doctor's office is the one who came up with this number. I was told to take my weight and divide it by two. That number put into ounces is the MINIMUM amount of water I should take in to keep my body functioning correctly. This doesn't take into consideration my exercise, extreme weather conditions, excess sodium/alcohol/caffeine intake or whether I'm fighting off a bug of some type. If those things are taken into consideration, I could need to add up to 25% of my weight in ounces of water on top of what I'm already drinking. Hence the reason I am taking in more than half my weight.

A similar number came up when I plugged in information to this water intake calculator. You can use it to loosely determine how much you should be taking in. ALWAYS double-check with your doctor to decide what's best for you.

Someone asked me what I'm eating - I'm really not eating all that differently. I'm trying to cut back on fried foods, limiting sugars (ok...totally not doing that this week, but normally, I do try to limit sugars) and not going overboard on carbs. I don't believe in eliminating any one food or group of foods simply because our bodies are designed to have nutrients that a variety of foods provide.

For those who are wondering, I started out Sunday weighing in at 249lbs (yes, I've gained weight since last summer/fall). I'm at 244 this evening. Like I said before, I can't guarantee this will work the same way for you, I'm simply saying, it's working for me.

Busting my ass...for what?

Twenty years ago, I buried my mother. I was 15.

She suffered an ugly fight with colo-rectal cancer.

She lost.

She spent her 51 years eating poorly, not exercising (due to numerous back and neck injuries) and smoking. In fact, I honestly don't remember my mother ever "feeling good." In the last twenty years, I've learned more about the things that led to her cancer. Some would argue that you can't prevent cancer - its genetic or predisposed. I call bullshit.

I don't smoke (okay, so I may have one cigar a year when the mood strikes me). I've also made a conscientious effort to change the way I eat. I struggle, but I'm SO much better off than I was a year ago. I've also begun exercising..and not in that wimpy I'm-too-busy-to-really-do-much-so-I'll-just-mall-walk-and-pretend-to-break-a-sweat way. I bust my ass regularly at the gym. My heart rate races. I sweat. I hurt. I ache afterward.

Why?

Because I don't want my children to have to be at my funeral instead of their third period math class.

I will NOT orphan my children. I will not make them watch me get sick. I refuse to leave them wondering what they could've done differently like I did when my mother got sick. I won't put that burden on them. And I know I don't have to. I'm making healthier choices every day to ensure their childhood won't include a hospital bed in their living room or hearing the words "we lost her."

So when somebody says, "Aww, take a day off. You've worked hard enough," I want you to understand why I can't.

Damn groundhog!

Ok, so I can't totally blame the groundhog for the entire winter, but you can bet I'm kickin' his ass about the next six weeks. Rat bastard.

I detest winter.

I don't mind being a little cool, in fact, anybody who's been in my house in the summer would swear I'm pumping freon through my walls. I can't stand feeling sweaty. But it's like Mother Nature has jammed five months of winter into two and I'm done. Just done. Since the beginning of December we've had over 45" of snowfall. Some has melted (or rather been pelted into submission by a couple of warmer days filled with rain and sleet), but the majority of it is still here. It's cold. It's white. It's fucking miserable.

For me, this makes it even tougher to draw the motivation to go to the gym. It's a pain in the ass to let the car warm up for 10 mins every time I want to go anywhere and that just adds time to my trip.  I hate getting all bundled up, driving the 20 mins to the gym, working out and then bundling back up to come home (waiting another 10 mins to warm the car back up, of course).

And let's just talk about winter food, shall we? Soups and stews are my favorite winter food and let's face it, the majority of my favorites aren't low-cal or low-fat. Now, if I were making regular trips to the gym, this wouldn't be a problem, but you read the last paragraph, you already know not only am I sitting on my ass most of the time and now you know that I'm eating shitty, too.

But things are looking up. The motivation that kept me going in July is back. I was fortunate enough to stumble into a video chat with Danny Wood tonight and told him about my weight loss in July when I met him for the first time and how I've added another 15lbs to that total loss. He congratulated me and told me to keep it up. (GAH!!) With two trips planned this summer to see NKOTB in concert, I absolutely REFUSE to let myself balloon back up. It's not that I'm foolish enough to think that Danny would recognize me, but if I do get the chance to talk to him, I want to be able to say "I lost another 20/30/40lbs" or even better yet, "I'm at my goal weight and it's all because of you!" He's saved my life and he needs to know that.

And I mean that sincerely - although sometimes fueled  by vanity, my health is the core issue and Danny truly has saved my life. I had something very scary happen in October that made me realize just how close I am to being a diabetic. I REFUSE that diagnosis. Period. I will not be a hostage to a testing kit, much less insulin injections. Heart disease also runs in my family. Again, I refuse to be bound to medication to keep my health under control. I KNOW what I need to do. Some days I just forget that I need to do it. I've still got that stupid "oh, I've got a hundred years left to get that figured out" mentality and it has to stop. My sister was my age when she was diagnosed with diabetes and she had her first heart-related "episode" around the age of 40, which is not too far around the corner for me. My health is in my control. I know what I can eat, what I need to do fitness-wise, what balances I need to maintain and I have to remember that I don't have a hundred years. I have now.

Today.

This is it.

And I'm taking the bull by the horns. No more bitching about the weather or the cold. The ground is a helluva lot colder when I'm buried under it than driving around above it. I have to keep that in perspective.

So once again, thank you Danny Wood for being there when I needed you. I hope someday you'll know how much you've done for me.

=================================================================

GOALS:

1. Gym: 4 days a week. 2 days doing HIIT, 2 days doing weight training
2. Cutting pop and sweetened tea COMPLETELY from my diet (limiting is not working)
3. Minimizing fried foods more strictly
4. Fewer carbs, more fresh foods

All this talk of detoxing...

...it has me curious.

My doctor has tried to convince me to do one of these for months and I've fought him on it.

Hard.

Like, really hard.

Let's face it, I love food. All kinds. The stuff that's good for me, the stuff that's bad for me, the stuff that's REALLY bad for me. Now obviously, I know what needs to be given up in order to live a more healthy lifestyle and for the most part, I've done that. I cheat now and then, but generally speaking, I do pretty well considering my addiction to food.

What I'm not sure I'm ready to give up, though is red meat or poultry, which is what many of these detox programs call for. I've never been fond of beans, which is where a lot of the needed protein comes from during detox. I'll eat them, but usually only after they've been slathered in butter (a detox no-no) or soaked in some sort of animal broth (another detox no-no). What's a foodie to do?!

I haven't decided if I will partake in this cleanse thing, but if I do, I will tell you now, you will be given PLENTY of warning so you can unfollow/ignore/etc me when my bitch switch gets thrown. I'm bad enough eating what I want. Imagine me being denied something I crave.

Yup. It's like that.

So, until I decide that my personality just isn't shitty enough, I'm going to just stick with a stricter diet and increase my water intake. I'm also cutting back (not eliminating entirely) my caffeine intake by removing soda from my diet (which is something I managed to do successfully last summer and then fell off the wagon, recently) and minimizing tea and coffee. "Stricter diet" means cutting back on fried foods, sugars and high-carbed items. Pretty much the same thing I did last summer. That I know I can do.

In the meantime, for those of you daring enough to try it, here are a few of the links I was sent this morning for detox:
http://www.weightlossresources.co.uk/DIET/detox/plan.htm
http://www.energiseforlife.com/detox-recipes.php
http://www.ehow.com/how_5298667_do-natural-full-body-cleanse.html

Good luck and pass your red meat this way, please.